“Ya, ya.. go to sleep…! It is getting late and if you don’t sleep now, you won’t be able to get up on time and we’ll be late.”
“But mommy, I want to talk to you, I just want to talk to you.”
“Ok, go ahead. If you want to ask question, one last question and then go to sleep, ok?”
I told Mer sternly last night after he has asked lots of questions. He is a loud talker, I don’t want him to wake up everyone as we are staying in a wooden house that has poor sound proof. He has been asking where will he be when he die, how would it be like up there in heaven. Yet after I’ve answered him that he’ll not die so soon, he still come back and said that he doesn’t want to die ‘cos he will be just like Great grandpa who never wakes up after that. I’m not sure how his mind work. At the same time I’m trying to answer his questions as simple as possible and maybe cut it short so that he could just go to sleep, or maybe just forget about it. But he continues.
He showed his frustration for me not answering him properly. He demanded an answer. He wanted my attention. Probably thinking all the while that he can get all the answer from me.
My sis in the other room was saying he was bullying me. When I was away at work in other places, he went to sleep early, talk less and obey more. But when I was around, he sleeps late, asks lots of questions and gets angry easily. When I think about it, he is probably thinking that since mommy is around, he wanted to share with me about his worried, his day experience, his wonders and hoping that since mommy is just besides him and won’t be going anywhere since we are all going to sleep, that’s is his best time to be with me.
Poor little guy who was trying to communicate with me and yet I was chasing him off to dreamland when all he wanted is to talk with me. I do hope that my sons will always share with me on anything at all. However I’ve probably be doing the wrong thing, giving them the wrong signal, chasing them away in doing what I think is best for them.
I think I need to start setting my mind on the right track so that they fill open to talk to me, to let me know what their thoughts are, or what their worries is about. I think I still don’t have enough patient to treat them equally.
Let me just try again tonight and see what will happen over a few days. I hope he’ll be satisfy with my answer and go to bed happily instead of frustrated.
